I wonder sometimes whether Mister understands what he’s taking on by moving in with me in the next two months. Sure, we’ll both benefit tons by being under the same roof – I’ve made a deal with him. He does the washing up if I dry. I can’t abide soapy water, I have sensitive skin that doesn’t like washing up liquid. Honest. I worked in a café wherein the dishwasher detergent removed my fingerprints. Couldn’t grip a thing, neither could I feel too well for a few months. Disaster. Again, I digress.
Not only will we have lots of helping each other with things on the domestic front (he also puts so much more effort into house-cleaning than I do. I’m such a house-slut) there will be the obvious intimacy of having eachother to ourselves…
…If I can stop myself thinking about/preparing things for/fretting over work.
My job I’ll be going to in the Autumn (have signed real life contract and evryfink) will involve a lot of planning both during work hours and afterwards. He knows this and understands that I will need some ‘Me Time’ on my own in order to do this. But I told him yesterday that I will need him so much more than I do already.
I will need him to help me switch off, stop thinking about work and above all, ensure I eat, sleep and be merry. I will need him to stop me from working past 10 o’clock in the evening. When I was training on my post-grad course there were many a night I would stay up close to midnight working and planning for the morning, leaving me with only getting in about 4-5 hours sleep. That. Can. Not. Be. Allowed. To. Happen. Or else I shall go crazy. My bosses and colleagues have warned me about making sure I don’t ‘go crazy’ with the workload in the first few months as I get used to the full-time job. That’s reassuring.
I hope that Mister is prepared for the amount of hugs I will need; hair smoothing to placate my stress and worry; massages to ease out the tension in my muscles. In return I shall provide him with a) my eternal gratitude, b) love, c) lots of nookie, and d) food.
I know that he is the most caring person I could wish to be with. For all his teasing and Pandorah-winding-up he does, when I need him, he is there. Many evenings I have had to call him up to vent my frustration, stress and anger along with heartache and worry in the last ten months. He may not have said much, but the mere fact of having him there on the end of the line – listening to me whine and babble on – was enough to calm me. He has a serenity about him – he rarely gets worked up about anything, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him properly stressed out. This, I think, reflects on me in my mindset which is amazing. I am generally a calm person also, but I do worry and get stressed occasionally. Having him by me in these times will be fantastic.
I can depend on him to help me out with this. He doesn’t even have to do very much. Just simply being there for me when I get home at the end of the day will instantly cheer me up. Looking forward to coming home to my dinner on the table him and relaxing in the evening together will be enough for the majority of the time. Currently I have this picture in my head of us sitting on the sofa, me curled up next to him or with my feet on his lap, and it makes me smile. Little thoughts like that do.
Like my earlier post - it is a picture I can see becoming a reality which makes me know it’s going to work.
Anyway, enough of this sentimental and emotional shit. Smuttier post coming soon! Promise.